Let’s be honest, divorce can be brutal. Amicable, or not you got married for a reason. There is always a lot of emotions when it ends. You may be happy being alone, and that’s great. Or you may want to grab the bull by the horns and start dating after divorce. There are a few things to think about, especially if you’ve been off the market a while.
Before you think about dating, make sure you have all your divorce ducks in a row. Sometimes it helps to find out more about where you stand, the stage your at and to keep tabs on the latest divorce informations, I find this blog very useful.
Make sure you’re ready to date after divorce
Before you throw your hat into the ring of divorced dating, it’s imperative that you ensure that you want to date for the right reasons. Don’t do it because you hate to be alone, or because your ex has moved on. It may be that you need a little time to ‘date’ yourself – get to know who you are outside of your old relationship. Go out and giggle with your friends, pick up a new hobby, do things you have never done before.
Even if you’re ready to date, it’s important to do be comfortable on your own. Have a sense of self outside of ALL your relationships, not just romantic ones. So go date yourself anyway!
Take it online
Meeting someone new in later life isn’t always as easy as it was when we were younger. More people are taken, everyone has there own lives and you aren’t meeting as many new people as you did in your 20s.
If you want to get serious about dating, then go online. Especially since we are living through a global Pandemic where it’s almost impossible to meet someone naturally. More so if you are living on your own and working from home.
In the past dating after divorce may have carried stigma. I know I’d rather date a divorcee than someone who’s in their 30s who has never had a serious relationship. If you’re worried about having to explain a painful divorce, or that someone may be apprehensive because you have children, think about joining a divorced dating site.
Virtual first dates
So, you’ve signed up to a dating site. You’ve met someone and have been chatting online, but you’re nervous about the first meet up. Why not suggest some virtual dates first? Since the Pandemic made dating impossible, video dating has become more popular as a way to get to know each other. This way you can see if there’s chemistry or a vibe between you and your potential beau before you meet up.
Not only does dating virtual mean that you don’t have to sit through an awkward dinner date carrying a conversation. It also allows you to make sure the person you are talking to is who they say they are and that you feel safe and comfortable for when you want to meet in person.
Don’t take it too seriously
It’s easy to get carried away with dating – does someone like you? How should you reply? How long do you wait to reply? But don’t take it too seriously, it should be fun. The right person won’t like you less if you reply too quickly, or your message is too long. If the person your talking to is playing games, or making you doubt yourself, then move in your journey.
Love Lilla xx
What are your divorcee dating tips?